The men’s group checking-in question

Most men’s group sessions start with a checking-in.

It goes like this in our group:

“How are you showing up tonight physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually?”

It is simple but not easy as it is as much of a self-attunement practice as a self-expression practice. It is a time to stop doing. It is a time to simply being and checking within ourselves, often for the very first time of the day if not for the week or the month.

The way I lay down the check-in question is on purpose to guide men into their inner attunement.

This guidance provided targets different layers of our inner existence experience, from gross (physical) to more subtle (spiritual). It is inspired by the four-fold model from different esoteric traditions, which is itself a simplification of a more complex model known as the seven-plane model in existence found in Theosophy for instance.

Being able to attune to these layers within is the beginning of our inner quest for Truth. We spend so much time and energy either ignoring or manipulating our experiences (How you doing? Oh I am good, thank you for asking. Sounds familiar?) that we are lying to ourselves without even being aware of it.

Checking in with ourselves is a real superpower and is opening a new world of possibilities.

Coming back to the check-in question itself, often during sessions men will ask about the meaning of checking spiritually. How do I feel spiritually? Everyone gets a sense of the physical, emotional and mental landscape but the spiritual one can feel stretched out.

Anyone has a perspective on the question, and usually, men have a sense or opinion on the question we talk about during the session.

For the session, I mean the question like this.

How do you feel toward everything that is but you? How do you feel toward something greater than yourself, that which has been called by many names such as Nature, Life, God, The Divine, the Universe, Brahman, Atman, the Tao, the Cosmos, Higher Self, Self, No-Self, choose your poison.

Do you feel faithful, hopeful, lost, abandoned, loved, guided, inspired, connected, disconnected, circumspect, aligned, on fire, angry, scared, curious, perplexed, …?

How is your relationship currently with something greater than you?